I'm Not Ready

Truth is,


I'm not ready to hear/face any thing that means death when I'm still studying. Especially when I'm at universities. Unfortunately, this is life and I can't escape from hearing news of death. I just hope it wouldn't for people who I love most and close to me (my family). Please, God, please, no, not yet. 

The memory in 2008 still lingers clearly in my mind. I didn't forget every single thing. And when 1 thing happened, I can't help but to feel scared. I thought, what if that's the last time we see each other? No, I'm not ready for another PERMANENT good-bye. No, I'm not ready.

It still haunts me. And when something like that happened, yes, I cried. I hope nobody saw that except for Yana who comforted me during the crucial time.


Maybe I've been holding this for too long..
3 years is quite a long time
But maybe I've been trying to be strong for so long
And maybe, just maybe
I should not hold it back anymore..
But I couldn't
I just couldn't
I'll still hold myself and let nobody come crashing in and nobody will never, EVER take his place in my heart.
IMYSM,AD and ILYF&E.



No comments

What's on your mind is there for a reason. :)